I have not forgotten you, Emily. I still think of you everyday. Sometimes very much. I miss you dearly. A few days ago, I dreamt of you, for the first time in the 3 months+ since you went to heaven. You came back alive and it was like a miracle since I remembered in the dream that you have died and was buried. But I was still very happy to be able to hold and smell you, it seemed so real. You were like what I remembered you but bigger :). In some strange way, I actually felt that it eased some of my longings for you.
But don't worry about mummy, because mummy is doing fine. Missing you has become part of my life and I don't mind that at all. The priest said that God sent everyone to this world for a reason and I want to believe that you came into ours to make us closer to God. I must thank God for the gift of my Emily. I am motivated to work harder to get to heaven to be with her.
When I pray now, I don't pray for her, I pray through her because she is a little angel (or rather, saint) now. My very own saint in heaven. I ask her to pray for us, to keep her brothers and sisters safe and healthy. To guide mummy and daddy to be more faithful followers of Christ, never ever to forget that we will always have you. I love you, my baby.
The tomb maker came back to us a week plus ago and showed us the inscribed marble stone for your tomb, it came out just the way I designed. They are making the structure as we speak now. So it should be completed today.
The other day, I saw a posting about Holy Innocents and I would like to end with that prayer, for all the babies and children who have died. especially for the young children killed in the shooting at Connecticut:
A Prayer To The Holy Innocents
Holy Innocents, you died before you were old enough to know what life
means, pray for all children who die young that God may gather them into
His loving arms.
Holy Innocents, you were killed because one
man was filled with hatred, pray for those who hate that God may touch
their hearts and fill them with love.
Holy Innocents, you experienced a violent death, pray for all who are affected by violence that they may find peace and love.
Holy Innocents, your parents grieved for you with deep and lasting
sorrow, pray for all parents who have lost young children that God may
wrap a warm blanket of comfort around them.
Holy Innocents,
those around you certainly felt helpless to prevent your deaths, pray
for all who feel helpless in their circumstances that they may cling to
God for courage and hope.
Holy Innocents, you who are now in Heaven, pray for all of us that one day we may join you there to bask in God's love forever.
Amen.
